Three Goodbyes That Helped Me Grow

In the last 7 months I have lost three important souls in my life.

June 19, 2014 I said goodbye to my dearest pup Lulu, my heart broke as I held her and thanked her for showing me so much over the 16 years, the greatest lesson while she was with me was teaching me how to be an adult, to take responsibility and care for a life other than myself.  It took me a long time to understand this, almost 16 years, but this little ball of love in a fur coat brought so much happiness, my debit to her is immeasurable. 

Her death led me to medium Rebecca Rosen who showed me that there is an afterlife.  Lulu reached out to me through Rebecca just to let me know she in death was now watching over me as a guardian angel, much like she did in her life.  The message Rebecca and Lulu shared with me gave me peace and understanding that there is much more on the other side and to not be so afraid, but have faith. This process helped prepare me for the next responsibility I would take on, the death of my beloved Grandmother Dorothy Chaiken...

January 15, 2015
Many of you know I had moved to Detroit in 2012 to help take care of my Nana Dorothy, I didn't want to miss the opportunity to be apart of her life in a bigger way.  Over the past two and three-quarters years we had many adventures together, it was a honor and my pleasure to be able to spend quality time with a women who was more than a Grandmother, she was a force of nature.  A story teller, singer, dancer, leader, model and fashionista up until the end of her life.  When she left us I was there to hold her hand and say thank you, tell her it was ok to go and that I loved her.  

Nothing prepares us for the death of someone you love, even when they spent 99 incredible yeas on the planet, it never seems to be enough.  I know that she is on the other side, watching over me, giving me strength and love.  My two ladies Dorothy and Lulu watch over me, I can feel it.

January 28, 2015
Only last week I made a very difficult decision to end and incredibly important relationship with someone I loved dearly.  Although my heart is heavy, I know that I am doing the right thing for both of us.  It is hard to love and respect someone and then try in a completely unselfish way be able to know that being apart will bring more to each of us as individuals. Some moments are more uncomfortable than others.  Most of them are peaceful, I feel like finally at 42 years and 9 months old I understand myself and how I want to be loved and give love in return.